Mania Lite

Less filling, tastes great? Not quite. More like: Less sleeping, more stress.

The last week I've been feeling up. Ever since my sleep got fucked last weekend. Starting the new job on Thursday just aggravated my elevated mood. I've been upping my Seroquel for the last 3 days or more. Now I'm at 100mg above normal. I should make sure my mood is stable before I reduce it back to 500 a day, what it was before. I also took some Klonapin yesterday to keep myself from freaking the fuck out. Talking to upset people on the phone all day is not conducive to a peaceful and serene life. In other words, I WILL NEVER WORK IN A FUCKING CALL CENTER AGAIN. If I forget this promise some how, please remind me. Now call centers have joined sales jobs and canvassing for money as "Shit I won't do even if you pay me."

I'm swearing a lot in this entry. I definitely lose some of the filter when I'm feeling up. Mostly it comes out in my conversations but it flows in the writing as well. Tonight I don't feel too off balance, but after I get up at 6am again tomorrow I'm sure I'll be feeling it. Well, when I get my paycheck next Friday I can be grateful that I actually had some work, unlike so many others out there right now. I am really thankful this job came up. I am twice as grateful that the other job that I start Monday came up, so that I can have this little taste of hell and then be done with it forever (maybe?).

I'll check back in as to what trajectory my mood continues to take. But for now I just need to get to bed on time and "take the fucking pills" as another blogger says.